Two gorgeous women bump and jive onto the stage. They are closely followed by a couple of very fit, very earnest young men. Then the routine begins. In between back flips and freeze-frame ballet, they mime a lifestyle full of surfing, camping, sightseeing and generally hyperactive youthfulness. A car lurks embarrassed somewhere in the background.

Such was Volkswagen’s launch of the Touran, a show designed to convey the car’s fun, energetic personality. It might all sound rather cringeworthy, but thank God for those back-flipping girls because the Touran itself is an extraordinarily dull thing to look at.

Based on the next-generation Golf (due to be unveiled in September), it’s a mid-sized people carrier aimed at the likes of the Vauxhall Zafira, Renault Scénic and Citroën Xsara Picasso. Still a rarity in this class, the Touran has the option of seven seats, with the third row of two folding flat into the floor, just like the Zafira’s.

One reason the Touran looks so dull is that the more squarish a shape, the more space efficient the packaging, even if this leaves little scope for the interesting curves of the more rakish Scénic and Picasso. The Touran is also faithful to the VW family look that, apart from the unashamedly bubble-like new Beetle, favours a solidly conservative outline. For a lot of customers, though, that’s a good thing because they want the world to know that they were sensible enough to buy a VW.

The interior is equally underwhelming, especially when trimmed in grey. It is, however, supremely comfortable, with masses of height adjustment on the driver’s seat and a driving position that is close to perfection. The cabin is light and airy and you don’t feel you are sitting on top of the car, as with some people carriers.

The build quality is predictably good — the Volkswagen Group really has cornered the market in luxury-feel rubberised surfaces for the dashboard. That said, the finish on the plastic seams on my car’s glovebox was a little rough and the rear cupholder was awkward to use and a bit flimsy — I broke mine.

The Touran, though, is a master of MPV flexibility. The second row of seats can be removed — at about 35lb apiece they’re not unmanageably heavy — and with the rearmost pair folded into the floor, you basically have a removals van.

Alternatively, with the middle row’s outer seats in place you can fold the centre backrest to make a large table. Or you can take out the middle seat and move the others inwards to create a more luxurious space for two. Inevitably, with all seven seats occupied, luggage capacity is limited and the third row is best suited to children.

When it goes on sale this summer, the Touran will offer a choice of three engines, a 115bhp 1.6 litre petrol unit and 100bhp 1.9 litre and 136bhp 2 litre turbodiesels. A slick-shifting six-speed manual gearbox is standard across the range, and later this year the diesels will be available with a clever clutchless transmission that is claimed to give smooth “automatic” shifts with the response and economy of a manual box. A six-speed tiptronic automatic transmission will be an option on the petrol model.

The Touran is a thoroughly decent drive. The ride may be a little on the firm side but its body control is outstanding even over quite challenging undulations, twists and turns. The steering, too, has a marvellously firm and communicative feel. A very stiff body structure means the car is quietly refined over rough roads, as well as being safer in a crash.

Volkswagen reckons we’ll like its new people carrier enough to buy 11,000 a year. Prices will start at £14,500 and rise to about £21,000, making it considerably more expensive than the Picasso and the Scénic. That said, its resale value is likely to be much better than the French offerings. Which makes the Touran a pretty sensible choice, even with those deadly dull looks.

VITAL STATISTICS
Model Volkswagen Touran S 1.6 FSI
Engine type Four cylinders, 1598cc
Power/ Torque 115bhp @ 5800rpm / 114 lb ft @ 4000rpm
Transmission Six-speed manual
Tyres 195/65 R15
Fuel/ CO2 38.2mpg (combined)/ 178g/km
Top speed 116mph
Acceleration 0 to 62mph: 11.9sec
Price £14,500 (estimated)
Verdict Fine build quality, solid engineering and outstanding driving feel. Just don't expect it to light a fire in your heart.
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