THERE may be a glut of television programmes about the police, but what do officers watch when they are off duty? The past week has offered a couple of insights. The Celebrity Big Brother house was raided by the Hertfordshire Constabulary to remove the fur coat worn by one inmate. The Daily Mail (Jan 20) reported that Pete Burns was suspected of having a garment illegally made from a protected primate. It turned out to be from a common species of monkey.

In the second case, police made a monkey out of a genuine criminal rather than themselves. An officer recognised a robbery suspect while watching a documentary, according to The Times (Jan 21).

Kidbrooke School in southeast London was on television last year when the chef Jamie Oliver tried to improve school meals. The Evening Standard (Jan 20) said that the school was one of the worst in the country for truancy. Surely not all the children are disappearing off for a crafty Turkey Twizzler?

The nanny state took on a new meaning this week with news that the Government has a policy on slippers for old people: they ought to fit. It spent £225,000 dispensing this advice. The cost is highlighted in The Bumper Book of Government Waste, which is due to be published next month by the Taxpayers’ Alliance. The Daily Telegraph (Jan 16) quotes the lobby group’s claim that the Government wastes £80 billion a year.

It may not come as much comfort to the group’s members to read in The Sun (Jan 20) that Sir John Major, the former Tory Prime Minister, has accused Labour of plundering £8 billion a year from the Lottery to prop up public spending.

Some individuals toiling on behalf of the State are doing their bit, too. According to the Manchester Evening News (Jan 19), a traffic warden ticketed a van and digger that were being used by workers in Bury as they resurfaced a street, even though the vehicles were covered by an exemption.

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