There was a happier, simpler time when video games were all about fun and escape from the real world. Shoot some Space Invaders; raid some tombs; rescue Princess Zelda.

Suddenly, however, my games console is telling me that I’m a bit tubby. And my new, hard-won Wii Fit game does not leave it there in its relentless critique of my health. “Did you eat dinner a bit late last night?” it asks me, accusingly, flashing my body mass index in giant orange letters across the screen. “Hmm. And your target weight-loss programme . . . we may have to review that in two weeks’ time at this rate,” it continues.

As a grim finale, as I stand nervously on the Wii Fit board - essentially a set of bathroom scales that is sensitive to pressure and motion – a cartoon avatar of me strolls on to the screen. With a drum roll, its tummy balloons outward to complete the ridicule. With the humiliation complete, the real work of Wii Fit begins. The game is not actually there to destroy self-image, but to make exercise more palatable. It does this brilliantly and efficiently – 30 minutes of its normal daily workout leaves even a fairly healthy person puffed and perspiring. For those who want more pain, it has tougher settings.

There are about 40 activities on offer, most of which involve the board. Because it can detect so many subtle variations of movement, the range of exercises is broad: step aerobics, ski jumping, tightrope walking and jogging. Surprisingly hard work, though, is the hula-hoop game, which involves gyrating the hips for three minutes as onscreen assistants hurl more hoops over your arms to increase the difficulty. For the more serious-minded fitness devotee, yoga and muscle-building exertions are there for the choosing. An onscreen personal trainer gently talks you through the ordeal, ruthlessly demanding that you hold a position for a few more seconds of agony. At the end of each day, the machine assesses your progress. At 32, I apparently have the body of someone five years older. I know that this is not good, but the game rubs it in just in case I miss the point: “Your posture really could improve . . . have a look in the mirror.”

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