Cynthia Carroll, a middle-aged American executive, came down for breakfast at the World Economic Forum in Davos at 7am. There was only one other person there: a white-haired stranger in his sixties. She sat down next to him. They chatted. Within a year the stranger, who turned out to be Sir Mark Moody-Stuart, had appointed her chief executive of Anglo-American, South Africa’s biggest company.

If we are to believe the statistics, such encounters make the business world go round. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, nearly 75 per cent of US executives land positions through contacts. The Law Society says that the British legal profession gains a fifth of its new business by referral or recommendation. And now networking seems to be intensifying and becoming more organised. The boom in online social networking (MySpace, facebook) is being shadowed by an explosion in online business networking (Linkedin, ecademy. com) and real-life business networks such as BNI, most of which are also online.

However, the explosion in contact-making has not necessarily corresponded with greater understanding of why networking is important and how to do it. For every confident networker there are probably thousands who feel allergic to the idea on the ground that it sounds cold and predatory and brings to mind gruesome images of people cutting you dead because someone more important has drifted into view.

I have long considered the words “networker” and “twat” synonymous, perhaps defensively, as I am so bad at it. Like Cyn-thia Carroll, I once found myself sitting next to someone important at Davos, in my capacity of a news reporter. But George Soros didn’t seem keen to maintain contact after he introduced himself and I responded by asking him what he did for a living. And when times2 suggested a piece on the subject it was about as appetising as licking clean a Morrisons’ meat counter. Even more so when it was suggested that I sample it by attending a networking event organised by a company called Business Junction set to take place on a boat cruising along the Thames on a Thursday afternoon. The idea of dedicating three hours to the dead-eyed exchanging of business cards is hellish enough, but when drowning is the only escape, it is even more so.

Before embarking on what was dubbed the HMS Business Junction– in reality one of those high-speed catamarans that zips up and down the Thames – I thought it might be sensible to seek some advice. And there was no shortage of it. Since the 1937 publication of How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie, still a global bestseller, books and articles on the subject of networking have been published at the rate of phone directories.

There are tips available on everything from what not to talk about (politics, health problems, religion), how long to spend talking to people (no more than eight minutes with the same person in the first hour), how to open a conversation (“So what’s keeping you busy?”, “How are you?”), how much to say about yourself (limit your “elevator pitch” to between ten seconds and a minute) and how to end a conversation going nowhere (“I’ll let you get on”, “I think we’re expected to circulate”).

There is even advice on where in the room you should stand (“Don’t block the bar . . . the more auspicious location is the end of the food table, where people are grazing”) and how to hold your drink (“In your left hand so you don’t give a clammy handshake”). Though I ignored this last recommendation and took two drinks as I boarded at London Bridge pier: in the hope it might make it look like I was with someone, and in case the booze might provide the necessary courage to begin mingling. It did.

Another piece of advice proffered by a US networking expert was to keep “a networking diary (or log)” of encounters. “Do it while your insights are fresh. Keep entries brief and to the point.” Apparently, Bill Clinton keeps an information card for every person he has met since university.

And so, my two hours of networking went something like this . . .

Mady Korada: managing director of eSpecial Softech. Indian chap. Friendly. Said he worked in “CRM and specifically open source”. Nodded and pretended to understand what this meant. Said he believed “software as a service model was the way to go for small-medium size companies”. Nodded again. Exchanged business cards.

Zane Piese. Latvian woman. Promoting “phenotypology”, a science that can apparently “diagnose personality” by people’s facial traits. Said I was “quite intelligent” because I had a long nose, though my “short neck” meant that I had tendency to become nervous in stressful scenarios. Claimed the science had many potential business applications. Exchanged cards.

Doug Mather, director of The Creation Company, business consultants. Well-spo-ken English chap. Explained that he was into personal development and specialised in “unleashing the potential in people”. Spilt drink over self while talking. Blamed lurching boat. Exchanged cards.

And so on. And on. And on. By the time we returned to London Bridge, I had spoken to 30 people. I can’t say that it was enjoyable. As an experience it felt like a cross between a lengthy job interview, being on the receiving end of a succession of cold calls and speed dating. But it was also educational. I learnt, for instance, that . . .

People network all the time. I knew networking was huge. But I hadn’t realised business people were so organised about attending events and how many different types of events were open to them. There are networks for women and ethnic minorities, networks for directors and entrepreneurs, networks that are free or cost thousands to join, networks that meet once a year or meet for breakfast once a week. You could spend your entire life going to networking events and some people seem to. Doug said that he attended at least one networking event a week. Mady said he had spent the morning at another networking event. At least half the people I met said that they got the majority of their business from networking.

Online networking is not killing real-life business networking.You might think the internet would present a threat to non-virtual business networking: if there is one thing the web is good at, it is allowing people to establish superficial relationships. But while most of the networkers I talked to were members of sites such as Linkedin, and said that they were great for identifying and maintaining contacts, there was consensus that the web wasn’t useful for building new relationships: you need to meet face to face to establish rapport. And there is a divide on facebook. Some people use it for business: asking contacts to become friends, and joining groups across a variety of business topics. But many others consider facebook too personal for work connections. Heidi Lavender, a sales manager for Yes Information Technology, put it best with the remark: “Are you crazy? I wouldn’t want contacts seeing pictures of me in my bikini.”

Men and women seem to network differently. It has often been suggested that one of the reasons women hit a glass ceiling at work is that they are more reluctant than men to network. A survey of redundant executives once found that men are seven times more likely than women to get a job by using personal contacts. But if the HMS Business Junction was anything to go by, women network differently when they do network: they spend longer talking to people, whereas men happily wind up a chat after a minute or two and move on. Do men find it easier to have superficial relationships? And then to exploit those rela-tionships?

People disagree on what kind of networking is most effective. Networking is probably just an exaggerated version of what most people do when meeting strangers: establishing points of common interest and building rapport. The question is how far you go.

There are those who believe it is necessary only to focus on a few important people who might be able to help with career development and business opportunities. Others think that you should talk to everyone you can – some networkers operate a “one-metre rule”, where they make a point of chatting to anyone who comes within one metre, any time, anywhere. Which is not to say I’m a convert. Networking is based on the principle that it’s not what you know, it’s who you know, and this is patently not always true. A well-connected moron is still a moron. Also at its heart there lies the fluffy and untenable notion that you can make your own luck. But I do think, on balance, that the current boom in organised online and offline business networking is a good thing. Networking has always happened, but previously surreptitiously at golf clubs, in gentlemen’s clubs, or at the Freemasons. But now it is possible to do it explicitly, without having to walk around in aprons, with a nipple exposed, or wielding golf clubs in horrific casualwear. It is becoming more democratic, open and honest. And as everyone at networking events is sometimes in the same boat, literally, it seems a less crass activity. Not that I had any success with it. Of the 30 people I talked to, only three subsequently got in touch. One e-mail was from Mady offering thoughts on CRM. Another was from Zane, inviting me to a seminar on phenotypology.

The third came from the one person I might have wanted to talk to again. The message said: “I met you yesterday at the Business Junction cruise. I do not want to be quoted in your article. Regards.”

How to network

Do your homework: Get a list of names in advance and research them on facebook, LinkedIn and Google.

Be all ears: People love yapping about themselves. A large part of networking is about listening and it is often said that introverts make better networkers. Keep your blurb about yourself short.

Followup: A post-meeting e-mail is good. Summarise your discussion, say it was nice to meet, stress what you have to offer, maybe suggest another meeting.

Keep updated: Keep in contact with those people you meet.

Understand your purpose: Are you networking for a new job or to sell a service or product? Don’t expect others to help you if you don’t know what you want.

Be nice to everyone: You never know who is important or who will be important one day.

Look interested: Learn to ask “So what do you do?” with sincerity. Don’t cut people off when someone more important comes into view.

Facebook: If you're going to befriend a business contact there, work out how to alter your privacy settings so that they don’t see potentially embarrassing material.

The early birds . . .

It’s 6.45am. People are mingling. With one hand, most hold cups of strong coffee. With the other, they are greeting one another like old friends. “Kat, how was your week?” says a tall man in a suit to a blonde in T-shirt and flipflops. “Great,” she gushes. “Those clients you referred have booked more massages.”

This is a BNI breakfast. Business Network International is the largest business networking organisation in the world, with 4,700 chapters (local groups) across the globe. Chapters meet every week, although you wouldn’t guess it from the grumbling: “Still not used to the early mornings,” yawns one member.

The idea is to make personal referrals – over breakfast each member (this chapter has 26) has 60 seconds in which to explain what they’re looking for. Some requests are general, like the masseuse who just wants “to relieve stress in the workplace”, or the divorce lawyer who’s looking for “any wealthy investment bankers about to start divorce proceedings”. Others are specific, from companies to individuals. At the end of the meeting, referral slips are passed round supplying requested contacts. One member needs the HR manager at Linklaters. Another has her number.

It’s oddly familiar: there are in-jokes and jibes and members play golf togethe. Each profession is limited to one member so there’s no competition; everyone’s expertise is exclusively valuable. “The approach is very feminine,” says Anna, a hypnotherapist. “It’s about co-operation.”

There’s something rather Americanised about it (the BNI motto is “Givers gain”). But it works. Referrals are given freely, with the expectation that the favour will be returned. The divorce lawyer recently referred the commercial lawyer on a buyout, generating fees of £30,000. A company director tells me he once made £80,000 from one referral contract.

“We know each other’s businesses,” says Patrick Williams, director of the Terrace restaurant in Lincoln’s Inn Fields. “I’d never refer someone I didn’t trust professionally.”

At 8.30am people trickle off. I am left with 30 business cards, a dozen feature propositions and an invitation to another networking event. I might just go. Francesca Steel

bni.com

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