A sure sign that there is a financial crisis. Every time there is a catastrophe, be it Enron, WorldCom, Northern Rock or HBOS, the same e-mail circulates (with a few tweaks), saying that £1,000 invested in the troubled companies a year ago would now be worth virtually nothing and we're better off putting our hard-earned cash into - believe it or not - beer.

The latest message finding its way to your inbox says: “If you had purchased £1,000 of Northern Rock shares one year ago, the investment would now be worth £4.95. With HBOS, earlier this week your £1,000 would have been worth £16.50. The same amount invested in XL Leisure would now be worth less than £5, but if you bought £1,000 worth of Tennents Lager one year ago, drank it all, then took the empty cans to an aluminium recycling plant, you would get £214.”

A separate e-mail in the United States uses the same format, but adds: “If you had purchased $1,000 of Delta Air Lines stock one year ago, you would have $49 left. With Enron, $16.50. With WorldCom, less than $5.00.” It appears from these statistics the best investment advice at present is to drink heavily and recycle.

Cybersquatters cash in on yourbankhere.com

With volatile markets not the obvious place to make an investment, now is probably the time to think up domain names.

Cybersquatters are desperately trying to cash in on the misfortune in the banking sector. At the moment, www.bankofamericamerrilllynch.com is being auctioned on eBay for $1,500, while www.bankofmerrill.com is at $2,050.

Other more amusing entries include www.merrilllynched.com, which features a logo of Merrill's signature bull being hung. The online brand management specialist NetNames said that other banks, such as LloydsTSB and HBOS, have fallen victim and sites with domain names like www.lloydstsbhbos.com and www.lehmanbarclays.com have been popping up recently.

— Talk about making the best of a crisis. The IFS School of Finance, a “financial education” charity, is registering students for an investment challenge, in which they are turned loose on the stock market with a fantasy sum to invest. “As the world enters the worst financial crisis since the 1929 Wall Street crash,” the charity says brightly, “one organisation is viewing the problems as a real learning opportunity for young people.”

— There is an awards ceremony for everything these days. The Royal Lancaster Hotel played host to the Best Factory Awards 2008. We're assured the event was a glamorous affair.

— Ping! It's an e-mail from Halifax. Must be more misery. Bank collapsed after all? Interest rate going up? Savings rate going down? No, the word from the beleaguered lender is that “It's time to relax”. Why? Because there's an offer of 35 per cent off home insurance. Isn't it nice that one of the group's divisions is so relaxed despite HBOS's very public suffering?

— Dear old George ... that pesky language thing keeps coming along to trip him up, doesn't it? As the Wall Street maelstrom gathered momentum, a sombre-looking President assumed his stern, statesmanlike aspect and told a waiting world that “short-sellers will be caught and persecuted”. That should worry 'em.

— Not right time for takeover

Peter Rigby, the chief executive of Informa, is no longer twiddling his thumbs wondering whether the private equity consortium will bid for his company by their deadline on September 26.

The consortium, which included Providence Equity Partners, Carlyle Group and Blackstone said yesterday that it had walked away after Informa rejected the consortium's £1.9billion takeover proposal.

Informa said that it was not in talks with other parties after the withdrawal of the private equity team. It told investors: “The board recognises that recent events in the credit markets have made it highly challenging to fund any offer.” In May, private equity began circling and Informa came close to merging with rival United Business Media.

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