NICE to see the Financial Services Authority is channelling all its energies into sorting out the chaos in the financial world. Or not.

Last week all FSA staff were handed an envelope. Inside was a chocolate coin and a fake ticket to an England v Germany game.

There was also a letter that asked: “Do you know what you should do if you were given these because of your position at the FSA? Read Chapter 6 of the new Code to find out!” Chapter 6, of course, outlines the new internal policy on the acceptance of gifts and hospitality. Oh, such wags.

However, it’s unlikely to make a jot of difference. In typical FSA fashion there are three pages with the minutiae of what employees can and can’t do, but no mention of what might happen if they break the rules.

Enforcement, it appears, must start at home.

Smashing time for the City

ALL characters, names and references in this story are based on real-life events.

Gymbox - a London-based fitness club - is opening a third gym in the City tomorrow. The venture is backed by Hotbed - an investment group for private speculators - to the tune of £1m. HSBC is stumping up another £1.1m.

Gymbox has made a name for itself among civilians and celebrities, including Denise van Outen, with its unusual range of classes. They include “chav fighting” - a skill investment bankers can learn to defend themselves against the worst ravages of British hooliganism, according to the website.

There’s also “white collar boxing” and, my favourite, the “Wag Workout” - to sculpt the perfect body for attracting millionaire footballers or billionaire oligarchs.

The gym also offers classes in Ultimate Fighting and cheerleading. Unfortunately, they don’t take place at the same time.

Not content with just having some rather controversial classes, the gym has signed up sprinter Dwain Chambers to teach a body-conditioning class - we can only imagine what that might entail - and the former European middleweight boxing champion Errol Christie as a personal trainer.

Gymbox’s founder, Richard Hilton, is confident the new outlet will be a real hit with City executives “looking for a way to destress and take their mind off Libor and MPC”. It also provides them with a legitimate way to beat someone up. Bound to be a raging success, then.

- VIRGIN ATLANTIC made a big fuss last week about stealing passengers from British Airways, saying it had capitalised on the chaotic opening of Heathrow’s terminal five. The company made the claim when it revealed sharply increased profits for the year, saying they were up from £6m to £34.8m. So can we have a look at the accounts? Not yet, it seems. Companies House records show Virgin Atlantic Ltd has not yet filed its annual results. A spokesman assures me they will be filed this week - it has been held up while people come back from holiday. No such delays in the press department, though.

- SPARE a thought for poor Ben Robinson, former head of PR at fund manager New Star. He was bumped off its annual Newquay press jolly next weekend by his badly timed resignation. Robinson is especially upset because he managed to stand on a surfboard only last summer after years of trying. As well as surfing he will miss luxuriating at the Cornwall-cool Watergate Bay Hotel and dining at Jamie Oliver’s restaurant. With this level of hospitality you could easily be tricked into thinking New Star is doing well.

BT’s site for sore eyes

WHAT do former glamour model Katie Price and Sir Alan Sugar have in common? Not a great deal, other than they tied for fourth place in a poll to find the most admired entrepreneur. The survey was carried out among the 170,000 members of BT’s Tradespace business social-network-ing site. Hmm . . . business people on a social-networking site? That probably explains why Price, aka Jordan, pipped Easyjet’s Sir Stelios Haji-Ioannou and the late Dame Anita Roddick to the spot. It might also explain why arch networker Sir Richard Branson topped the poll.

prufrock@sunday-times.co.uk phone 020 7782 5804 fax 020 7782 5765

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