Daniel Allen
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See that cloud? It belongs to the office grump. It follows him everywhere and envelops anyone in close proximity in a misty gloom. The grump is so grumpy that he makes Morrissey look like Baby Spice.
Grumpiness is not good. It spreads like a virus. It gnaws at office contentment, withers pot plants and can even make your computer crash. Which then makes you grumpy and before you know it everyone is grumpy, motivation plummets, sales sink, the company is bankrupt and we’re all left contemplating the end. No wonder, then, that much is made of workplace civility. Daniel Goleman, a psychologist and the author of Social Intelligence: The New Science of Human Relationships, champions courtesy and respect towards colleagues. But civility has enemies, he says. People at work in any organisation face a panoply of forces to overpower the urge to be civil.
Stress, multitasking and too little time to do too much are all potential civility-stranglers. Eager to understand these issues, Johns Hopkins University in the US established its own civility initiative where the significance of manners and politeness in contemporary society is assessed. Its research indicates that although no one likes the office grump, everyone is too polite to say so. That causes seething frustration and, eventually, an explosion of decidedly uncivil anger.
But hold on. Will no one defend the grump? Perhaps his sour demeanour is founded not on impoliteness but on a reluctance to play by other people’s rules. Manners are a mere convention, after all, and civility simply an extension of that. Perhaps Mr Rude is not really rude but an individualistic and creative antiautomaton trying to subvert custom and complacency. Not for him the Pollyanna platitudes and cheery but unfelt “good mornings”. He might, underneath, be a good guy. Go and ask – but only after he has finished his coffee.
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