Action: Hear me - there is plenty of action in The Broken World so do not be in a hurry to get in trouble. You will need (1) to get the Weapons and (2) to practise the Jump and Roll and the Stealth Attack. There is more than enough Action for anyone.

Bad Guys: This guide helps you fight the bad guys and will get you to the end every time. Please follow my advice.

Crowded Earth: Maybe the most complicated level of the game they ever made. A vast city with thousands and thousands of characters all going about their business. Take a look at those streets – you do not want to go Xmas shopping there. One of the people in that crowd – and only one of them - has a clue for you – a code comprising 12 numbers. You cannot cheat it. You cannot cheat it. Some players get lost in this level and never get out.

Domenico’s: Home of cooked circular food since er, 1982. Voted Best Pizza in the Urals Style and an all round experimental research station for health and safety and food hygiene violations. Also known as The Unfortunate Day Job. See also Miroslav and Branimir.

Empty Level: A whole level made of nothing but landscape. Cities. Deserts. Towns. Beaches. Islands. Jungles. Did they forget to fill in the puzzles and the Bad Guys? Where are the fights? Where are the portable nukes? Did they get bored at this point? Or is there some secret mystery that no one found in there yet?

Fight: That is what we came here for right? Trade in your first aid kit for a Blaster or the Pump Action Shotgun. We have Zombies to kill.

Game Over: There are so many ways to buy it (i.e. DIE) in The Broken World, it’s hard to recount them all. I mean there are the obvious ones dude – run out of LIFE points, get shot in a blaster, step on a mine, fall on a mineshaft, get caught in a explosion of a portable nuke, get shot in the back, drink poisons, be stabbed to death and lacerated, get pushed off a building, miscalculate a jump between swinging bridges, answer questions wrong in Quiz of Death, get staked out in front of ants nest or left in burning sun, get shoved in front of a speeding bullet train etc. You can get smashed in a car crash, dissolved in acids, or get a plague from Out of Space. You can also get Uranium Sickness, Chemical Sickness and fever from an infected werewolf bite. He can breathe in the Chemicals or the Mystery Fog. Or get poisoned by Archduke or by Rialto or by someone else. Or shot by Agents of GARS. Or executed by a guy called Fulton or Transmission or by a guy whose name you did not catch in a Boiler House or a Canning Factory or in an Amusement Arcade. Or get smothered in sleep by the gorgeous and untrustworthy Natallie, Sophia or Juliette. There are so many ways to watch that red bar of life get smaller and smaller and smaller in the left hand side of the screen and at a certain point to know that it will not get better, that you will not make it to the next health pick up points, that there are no Potions in your bag that can cure it this time, that there is no Doctor of Medecine (I cannot spell it properly) to help things out. There are so many ways to buy it in The Broken World.

High Five: You will need this for a greeting in the freaked out kind of War Zone they created near 43rd Town.

Invisible: You need level three invisible skills to get thru the maze and retrieve the key. If you cannot hack the training you can maybe buy a potion off some guy at the Fountain in Third Town.

Jones: He is just some guy that used to live in the apartment downstairs. He went to Baltimore I think.

Karate: Make sure you level up on Karate Skills and the Kicks before you leave the boat at the Start of the Game. The first bad guys you come to are more like crash-test dummies but after that you need to get in good Ass Kicking Mode.

Lonely: OK. So that is how the apartment feels now that Tory (hi Tory) headed out on some ill advised camping trip with her sister Linda (not the nice one, the crazy one that just got back from travelling in Asia I think – but apologies I was not paying full attention). In an empty apartment you can survive on (1) noodles or (2) two meals made of breakfast cereal and (3) three cracker things that were left in Tory’s gym bag (ughh) but at least that means no time wasted on sunlight or shopping time and therefore MORE time for the game. I am not obsessed. I just want to get to the end of the level.

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